A new mum has banned her mother-in-law from spending any time alone with her children after she betrayed her wishes and left her feeling “violated”.
The mum explained that she had experienced some “cultural differences” with her husband’s family in the past, and usually tries to stay out of it unless it comes to her two children.
When she gave birth to her daughter, who is three months old, she says the topic of ear piercing came up, and her husband’s family said it’s in their culture for the girls to get their ears pierced “pretty much at birth”.
The mum said she was not comfortable with the idea because she wanted to wait until her daughter was old enough to decided for herself, rather than making the decision for her.
She wrote on Reddit: “I told my mother-in-law this, every time she pestered me (pretty much from the time I was post-labor and she came to visit me in the hospital). My husband agreed with me.”
The mum thought the matter had been resolved and recently left her baby with her mother-in-law while she ran some errands.
She continued: “Mother-in-law kept them out a bit later and when she returned…my daughter had pierced ears.
“She said she had my sister-in-law (husband’s sister) do them. She’s done them for all the babies in the family and it was tradition.
“I was ped. I felt so violated, took my kids and told her to leave. My husband was equally as ped and they argued outside for quite a bit before mother-in-law left.”
The mum has now banned her mother-in-law from seeing her children alone, and says her husband is “on the fence” about the decision, while his family have been left “fuming” by the ban.
After asking if she had overreacted on Reddit, one person replied to say: “Your children not hers. If she can’t respect the decisions you and your husband make then she isn’t fit to babysit.”
A second wrote: “That is absolutely NOT OKAY. It’s not like oh she painted your kids nails and that washes off. No she put HOLES in YOUR BABY’s ears.”
And a third added: “The mother-in-law went behind your back when you explicitly said you don’t want your kid’s ears pierced which is not ok. If she can’t be trusted to follow your simple instructions she shouldn’t be allowed to watch your children.”